Evan T.R. Rosenman

The Twelve Years of Grad School (2018)
co-written with Michele Zemplenyi, and performed yearly at the Stanford Statistics holiday party

In the twelfth year of grad school,
my advisor gave to me:
Twelve LASSOs shrinking
Eleven knockoffs lurking
Ten sequences converging
Nine models boosting
Eight chains a’mixing
Seven boots a’strapping
Six students whining
Five thesis inklings
Four kindly words
Three ML trends
Much tough love
And the promise of a degree!